Airport
Right. So I repacked everything I had just unpacked and washed the day before, slept a couple hours and got on a plane to Toronto. I hate airport security, and all DC flights have extra security stops, but I try to be friendly. They're just doing their job, you know, pulling every last thing out of my bag.
"What's this sir?"
"That's my necklace."
"Is it made of metal?"
"No."
"What's this sir?"
"That's deoderant."
"Could you take a sip from your water bottle?"
"Of course."
"Sir, could you take your shoes off?"
"Sure."
Maybe my cooperation payed off though. After I dropped my bag off and headed for the long line towards the metal detectors the lady who had searched my bag grabbed me. "You'll be there for an hour. Go this way," she said, and put me through a back door into a different line.
So I'm sitting at my gate, waiting to board and I notice a few things. First there's this kid and his parents behind me and he's just going on and on about the beaches and how he can't wait to get to the beaches but the brat can't say 'beaches' properly and it sounds more like "Oh Mama, the bitches, the bitches are so nice. I never seen so many bitches in the pictures, I can't believe we're going to the bitches. I'm gonna spend all day on the bitches."
Anyway. The next thing I notice is this guy, an airport employee, who's walking some kind of container back and forth. He walks one way, I see him drinking a can of cola. A few minutes later he's walking the other way, pushing his cart, drinking a cup of coffee. Alright, it's Monday morning, maybe he needs to boost is blood-caffeine level. Maybe five minutes after that he walking back and now he's pounding back a bottle of Sprite. Jesus, this guy is gonna kill himself before noon. I decided to hit the bathroom.
Observation number three. Drying my hands I glance over at a machine that dispenses three things. Snickers bars, condoms and tic tacs. A quick snack, some quick sex and you can still have fresh breath. Perfect.
"What's this sir?"
"That's my necklace."
"Is it made of metal?"
"No."
"What's this sir?"
"That's deoderant."
"Could you take a sip from your water bottle?"
"Of course."
"Sir, could you take your shoes off?"
"Sure."
Maybe my cooperation payed off though. After I dropped my bag off and headed for the long line towards the metal detectors the lady who had searched my bag grabbed me. "You'll be there for an hour. Go this way," she said, and put me through a back door into a different line.
So I'm sitting at my gate, waiting to board and I notice a few things. First there's this kid and his parents behind me and he's just going on and on about the beaches and how he can't wait to get to the beaches but the brat can't say 'beaches' properly and it sounds more like "Oh Mama, the bitches, the bitches are so nice. I never seen so many bitches in the pictures, I can't believe we're going to the bitches. I'm gonna spend all day on the bitches."
Anyway. The next thing I notice is this guy, an airport employee, who's walking some kind of container back and forth. He walks one way, I see him drinking a can of cola. A few minutes later he's walking the other way, pushing his cart, drinking a cup of coffee. Alright, it's Monday morning, maybe he needs to boost is blood-caffeine level. Maybe five minutes after that he walking back and now he's pounding back a bottle of Sprite. Jesus, this guy is gonna kill himself before noon. I decided to hit the bathroom.
Observation number three. Drying my hands I glance over at a machine that dispenses three things. Snickers bars, condoms and tic tacs. A quick snack, some quick sex and you can still have fresh breath. Perfect.
posted by James at 3:28 PM
2 Books were burned:
aeroports- not fun at all. my last trip to england i was searched on my way back into the states. i think it had something to do with the bag that i was carrying- i bought it in london before departing and it had indian writing on it (i should post a pic on my blog soon). before that, i had never been searched.
as for airport employees, seems there are a lot of those 'do-nothing' types in airports. or maybe they are really spies in disguise...
enjoying your photos, btw. :)
Throw one on the pile
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